Lament
by Firefury Amahira
Summary: Lament n.A song or poem expressing deep grief. Valerie wasn't killed in the explosion that robbed Danny Fenton of his family, his friends, and ultimately his humanity. But sometimes being the only survivor is the cruelest fate of all.


**DISCLAIMER:** While I suppose I'm still not actually ripping anybody off, this is much closer to fanfiction than the poems I've posted in "Of Rhyme and Reason", so... Yeah. Dun own Danny Phantom, please don't sue me.

**Author's Note:** I was sitting in my Geology class Tuesday night, when an idea for a new poem slapped me upside the head. But not a regular poem. No, this one was to be vastly different from my previous 20-30 line rhymes. This was going to be epic! And in a first-person perspective, namely Valerie's. For the record, I am firmly a fan of D/S, but you sure as hell wouldn't know it from this. Several sleepless nights and 310 lines later... I present you with...

**Lament**

By: Firefury Amahira

**The End**

The day my world ended was a regular day

No gloom, no storms, nor portents of doom

It was his world that ended that day, not mine

So I thought, but it was his tragedy that brought

Disaster to many and destruction to us all

His grief that was boundless, the guilt his alone to recall

Had I but known, could I have prevented his fall?

Blind in my hatred, set firm in my course

Deaf then to sound reason, now full of remorse

The tragedy cruel, but none knew the force

Even now almost none know that it was the source

The prelude to rampage, sign of what was to come

Few saw the warnings in that young face so glum

In an instant his world was thrown to the wind

That most dear to him, his friends and his kin

Lost forever, gone to the sky

Proof of his failure, mark of his shame

Sign of his weakness, with none else to blame

With home empty solace, and school no reprieve

Silence around him, left alone to grieve

He needed a friend, and it was me that he sought

I swore I would listen as his story was wrought

That promise was broken at his secret revealed

I acted on impulse, in anger I shouted

His sincerity doubted, old habits die hard

Even then, in the face of that sorrow

I acted in cruelty, his last hope gone sour

The last hour I saw him, I drove him away

The next day I looked, but he was gone by that morrow

Vanished just like the ghost I had chased

Where once was my anger was soon replaced

By guilt and worry, my old hatred erased

It would be many years before I discovered

The truth of his leaving, that he never recovered

With none left to turn to, he went to one of his kind

A mistake in the making, both his and mine

The pain overwhelming, the grief all-consuming

An end to his suffering was all that he sought

A youth distraught, looking to kill his pain

With nothing to lose and all to gain

He got what he wished for, but at what cost?

His sorrow was lifted, but his humanity lost

He died that day, in more ways than one

Murder or suicide, the result is the same

The boy I loved had died

And I had only myself to blame

My mistake, it would haunt me, overshadow my life

Heavy with guilt that cuts still like a knife

One boy's mistake launched by one foolish girl

Doomed then was our world, now filled with strife

**Salvation**

When next I did see him, he was changed

Into something horrible, mind rearranged

With mistaken relief I rushed out to greet him

Belief misplaced that my friend was come home

That I could undo the things that I had done

Apologies fell from my lips in a tangle

My arms looped around him, I embraced his cold form

My tears shed for joy as I rejoiced his return

Certain sure now that we could put things right

His hands gripped my shoulders and held me at length

It was then that I first truly studied his face

Saw those red eyes, felt his terrible strength

Gone was the boy with intense emerald eyes

Gone was his kindness, gone was his concern

Gone was the boy, never again to return

With head aflame and eyes that burn

No compassion remained, that I learned

With his wicked delight my affections were spurned

Before my eyes, my dearest friend

Had become the very nightmare I dreaded

I should have shot him, then and there

But with guilt and hope, I didn't dare

The thought of killing him I couldn't bear

That he was already gone, I wasn't aware

My heart turned traitor and wouldn't fight

His might overwhelming, his intentions a fright

My joy was frozen, my fear realized

In my weakness I should have died

An easy kill, that was until

A new figure arrived, one I knew

His valor great but his power small

He fought bravely while I was enthralled

Wounded badly from the fire he drew

I was finally shaken from stupor

By the blood his wounds spewed

My injuries searing, I returned to the fray

Not to do battle, but to get us safe away

That day was awful, that I recall

My friend on a rampage that none could stall

Nothing seemed to ease his rage

The fury of a monster freed of its cage

I had to stop him, or no one would

But in the past he'd done such good

Innocents suffered for my indecision

Old hatred bound by new sorrow

Losses mourned on time ill-borrowed

In the midst of my agony came a singular vision

Last dying wish of a friend since passed

There was no going back, this conclusion foregone

It was my mission, my only goal

I had to stop him, only I could

If he was now the demon I had believed he was

Then I had to hate him as I had then

Twice now he'd ruined my life

Taken everything from me

My comfort, my home, my father's health

A twisted cruelty, I did as he'd done

Buried my love, locked away my compassion

There can be no mercy for those who give none

There can be no redemption for the soul that's gone

There was only one fate, to save him t'was too late

With heavy heart and anger burning

The masses rallied, the battle turning

An ill-trained army fighting, falling

Back to the gate from whence his troubles had spawned

The trek paved red from the defenders fallen

On the brink, I confronted him then

Stared down my memories, sealed them away

He was weakened then but never beaten

Only hatred in those crimson eyes

Hatred for me, for all who lived

For having things he had lost, his joy forfeit

The moment had come, the threshold crossed

I had to drive him, force him across

I couldn't beat him, he couldn't die

But I had to thwart him, I had to try

He had to be sealed 'fore the gate was destroyed

My only concession, a tear in one eye

I fired my gun as I told him goodbye.

The gate then closed and could never reopen

We had to recover, we had to rebuild

It was too good that he was gone forever

I saw it bright as day in those hating eyes

He would return, with greater power he'd rise

And with it lay waste to all he despised

Irony abounds, we raided his home

For he and his had the things that we needed

The warning of his destruction heeded

The survivors would all learn to fight

When he returned, it would be an army alright

But seeking advice, I had to take flight

Imagine my surprise at the sight

A castle in shambles, ruins pale in the light

The keeper battered, his expression contrite

A man, spirit broken, mind burdened with sin

With a sad smile he invited me in

Surprised by the wreckage I saw without and within

I asked what had happened, imagine my chagrin

When he explained what happened, and what he had been

The fault was his, he quietly explained

The boy came to him, in grief barely sane

So he had offered an end to the pain

The effort was bungled, the boy went insane

Ripped him in half, this was all that remained

A man torn in two, the boy now his bane

My breath caught tight as I dared ask

"What happened to his human half?"

His face a mask, he beckoned I follow

Down a passage to a secret hollow

The room a disaster, roof open now to the sky

The tools all scattered, I wondered why

He brought me here, to see this mess

When with trembling voice, the man confessed

This was were it all went wrong

Where the demon became so strong

It was here, he said, the boy had died

That's when I saw it, one wall stained red

My throat seized at the truth, that moment of dread

I'd known in my heart that he was dead

The tears I'd withheld now freely shed

I fell to my knees near that painted wall

My anguished cries echoing through shattered halls

With weary care I was shown the boy's simple grave

The resting place of a hero brave

Leaving behind a creature depraved

My anger renewed, this man was the source

In the face of my fury, he was only remorse

Hearing my troubles, of that terrible force

He gave me what tools that he could

Not asking forgiveness, he understood

The deeds he had done, the crime he committed

He freely admitted his condemnation was due

His actions now he would forever rue

His gifts in hand, homeward I flew

A blot on the horizon and I feared the worst

A war in progress, at the explosions I cursed

The nearer I got, the more horrible it was

Smoldering tanks, soldiers killed all because

The terror they faced was above all their laws

As I soared over the maelstrom, I saw him again

Taller, more wicked, delighting in ruin when

His eyes met mine, his smile cruel

My anguish buried, my anger fueled

Once again we violently dueled

But I wasn't alone, not in this battle

In matching suits, their weapons rattled

The dome viridian our only safety

We flanked him, somehow drove him away

The losses were steep, the defenders weakened

The demon held back by well-armed children

His hate ever-rising, he vanished away

But I knew we hadn't yet won the day

He was freed, and bound to return

A fortress was needed, this we had learned

One at a time the towers soared

A shield on a scale seen never before

But the masses were foolish, they ventured outside

He was gone, they reasoned, why should they hide?

But those who knew, we stayed ready

Weapons poised, our resolve steady

Heralded as heros, accolades ill-deserved

It was only desperation that had steeled our nerves

Despite all our warnings, the city grew beyond

The reach of the shield, it would take too long to respond

I tried to convince them, but they laughed at the danger

They felt they were safe, that I could protect them

In the past, such adoration would have made me whole

But in darker times it simply weighed more on my soul

I knew my limits, that if he returned

His strength would be greater

And we would all burn

It wasn't very long before he proved me right

The explosions that came in the dead of the night

Screams filled the darkness as the buildings came down

Once more I flew in defense of the town

"You think you can stop me?" He sneered as I fired.

I told him nothing, my hatred inspired

I no longer saw him as the boy from my past

My love since killed and by anger surpassed

It sickened me, as with such glee

He evaded my blows, his interest in those

Fleeing below, the families with children in tow

With a flick of one hand a wall crashed upon them

Cries lost in the chaos, mine and theirs

He was toying with me and I began to despair

But at last the call came, that the survivors had fled

The defense was over, and on a chase he was led

I smiled with bitter glee as I shot under the dome

In his rush to beat me home and stain the ground red

He didn't see what was there, and on the dome smashed his head

I waved with mock sweetness as he angrily raged

And threw all his strength at the shield we'd engaged

Despite all his efforts, despite all his might

He was repelled by a thin dome of blue light

His prey safely sheltered, he turned instead

To the buildings outside he could easily shred

Outside he left a wasteland we saw tinged blue

But when this time he left, everyone knew

To venture outside was a terrible folly

Our perimeter secure, life slowly resumed

How could we have known that we were all still doomed?

**The Fall**

Time passed onward as it is wont to do

Safe in our home, a city grown skyward

Desolation all around us, never far from thought

Comfortable in safety so direly bought

But our end was coming, the end of it all

Our final bastion, our fortress would fall

Otherworldly wailing pierced the afternoon

To the towers, shining sentinels it was attuned

One by one I watched them fail

In childlike helplessness I was thrown from the rail

The technology that saved us had also doomed us

I could hear him laughing, a wicked sound

In horror I watched our comforting light

Ascend toward the heavens as it vanished from sight

In the wake of that terrible moment

We all stared in silence

We knew what it meant

We didn't know what to do, but that our time was spent

The first battle I fought wasn't with him

He was too busy raining down his wrath

Slaughtering people, relishing our torment

It was all I could do to stall him for awhile

So that people could run, and perhaps get away

I stared down that monster and his malignant smile

His power grown terrible, his intent ever hostile

He merely threw me aside as the city died

Our safety gone, us few scattered alone

I saw the destruction, knew the terrible truth

His cruelty complete, I saw what was left of my youth

He finally stole everything, I had nothing left

My family destroyed, my friends lost in the cleft

Grim now as death, a huntress bereft

I was now like the boy I had loved

With nothing to lose and all to gain

I had to finish him, to end this pain

I would hunt him down and end his reign

Stalking the wastelands, my new domain

Red nightmare, phantom's bane

A lone wolf on a mission, on hatred sustained

I would not rest until I obtained

The vengeance I desired, I knew I was insane

Running on fury, I was running to death

I thought then I saw him and caught my breath

A ghost of a memory, or figment of madness?

This was not the demon I'd come to hate

No this had to be some kind of emotional bait

Feelings I'd buried surged again to the fore

I yelled out as I ignored them, trying to end this war

All the anguish of the years, all the terror, the gore

I would have killed him, the boy out of memory

But snapped from my madness by two young faces

They were ten years dead, why here of all places?

Impossibly come, all three from the past

Before the nightmare began, the day was his last

Then he showed up, the demon I hunted

To my surprise he was confronted

By this strange ghost of the past

We were both overpowered, the battle was fast

The boy saved my life before I blacked out at last

The past fought the present, a disturbing contrast

He saved me from madness, vanished without trace

When I woke I wondered what had brought him to this place

From the midst of the chaos, I recalled his embrace

His desperate eyes shining in that determined face

Our time was cut short, and I unable to pursue

He was gone when I woke, after all I'd been through

That I saw the fond memory was too good to be true

But still, I never got the chance to bid him adieu

I never told him

"I love you."


End file.
